Inevitability

Anyone else remember this jingle? No? Oh right, that's because I'm old.

I suspected I was getting old since I turned thirty some years ago and thought, "Oh Terralyn, dont be a fool! You will live forever and always look this good!" Silly me. My suspicions were correct.

I kept saying, "getting older doesn't bother me!" I thought that women who had these little "freak outs" when they had a birthday were just plain ridiculous. I was surely never going to be one of them. "Aging means becoming a wiser person." Yep..that's another short sighted quote from yours truly.

Cue this year's birthday. Why was this one more difficult for me? Who knows?

Suddenly I am having second thoughts about my current love/hate relationship I have with dying my hair to cover the gray. I have always hated dying my hair. one time in my life did I mess with dye..and that was to try to go platinum. Black to white, no big thing right? (I can practically feel the virtual forehead smack from my readers) We all know that it turned out orange. A lovely, sick, washed out version of orange. Or let's just say for the sake of my pride....copper. Yeah that sounds better doesn't it? (just nod and leave me with at least a little sense of pride...pretty please?) At any rate, dye hating. After the one "squabble" I had with the bleaching stuff I have only dyed my hair as necessary to cover my grays. Actually you know what? I am gonna put it right out there...it's white hair. I have somehow bypassed gray and gone straight to white. I'm just that frigging special. The white hair started out as a couple at the temple. No biggie..they were cool! I had two white hairs! HA! I laugh at you white hair and raise you a still beautiful full head of black hair! Those bastards multiplied. It was no longer just me noticing it. Others were pointing it out. "Wow, you have white hair Terralyn!" "Uh oh, look who needs to start dying her hair!" Who the hell thinks these are acceptable things to say to a woman? You wanna know who? Any OTHER woman who is having to dye their own hair. It's somehow bolsters their own self esteem.. they are adding another woman to the ranks of their club. (I have yet to be invited to said club but I know they must exist.) So, I have dyed. I have caved to the belief that gray hair ages me. Well not anymore. I am thinking about being a bit rebellious. If I am going to HAVE to age..then I am going to take full advantage of the rights that come with that. One of them being I can be as eccentric as I want. I don't care if I look like the woman in the above picture. If that's how my hair wants to exist..then so be it. No more slaving over chemicals so strong it is a sure fire way to clear a room of anyone. No more dreading having to make my trip to the store to stand there for who knows how long studying each box, and type, and color. Am I black, or dark brown, or maybe reddish dark brown, or natural black? I DON'T FRIGGING KNOW OK?! Why can't these companies all get together and come up with a color scheme and name? Assholes. At any rate...not going to do it anymore. If you see me on the street (yes, I'm often just walking the streets) then feel free to stop and laugh and point out that I am graying. Or whiting..in my case. Just go ahead..I can deal. I am not stressing this age thing one little bit. Not going to sit here and think about being one day closer to boobs that hang to my waste, or a chin that can double as a sail. Not even worried an ounce that I am getting hot flashes or hormonal mood swings that make me kiss my husband one second then consider smacking him with the swiffer the next. Pshaw, I am so relaxed it's disgusting.

But I swear to god if anyone so much as whispers, "happy birthday" to me next year I'm going to bitch slap them.