Saving the day

Oh the classic hamburger..tell me this doesn't look yummy as hell! Unless you are a vegan or a vegetarian that is..then disregard that statement. (and I forgive you for not eating meat..but just barely) When we go out to eat I love to order my food decked out and dressed to the nines. The more veggies, the better. The more condiments, the better. I could actually leave out the bun and just eat everything else.
My husband would disagree. He eats no condiments. NONE. You wanna know how he orders a burger? You're dying to know. Admit it. When he orders a burger he says, "I'd like the biggest hamburger you have. Just the burger and the bun. No cheese, no lettuce, nothing but the burger and the bun." This is usually followed up by a look from the waitress that suggests he's crazy. Then they barrage him with questions about condiments and veggies and spices and my husband has to say "no" a thousand times till they finally understand that he means business when it comes to ordering a plain burger. Often times a waitress will just stand and stare like he has just asked her to bring him a hand-carved burger that's gold plated. He stares back blankly while she blinks at him in silence.
One would think that ordering a burger in that manner would make the cook's life easier. Last night we went out together and he placed his typical order. We sat for a while talking till they brought our food out. As usual, my husband inspects his burger like a detective looking for fingerprints at a crime scene.
Looks like a big hunk of meat sitting on a bun to me. Until he flips it over to inspect the underside. (I'm not lying..he's this serious about it being plain.) The horror on his face was priceless as he lifted the patty gingerly to look underneath. Traces of cheese where the cook obviously forgot and then scraped it off were apparent. He looked disgusted. He looked like he might cry... for a moment he put his balled up fists at his side and just sat there fuming.
He would have taken his knife and cut the bottom half off and ate the rest pissed off because this man that is so picky also has a hard time "putting people out."
I saved the day by calling a waitress over and showed her the mistake and asked her to have the cook make him a new burger. I also asked her for the cook's license plate number so I could wait outside by his car to take him out at the knees with a crowbar to get vengeance for my husband.....but she never gave it to me.