It's hard to break away from the cycle of fear that pervades much of our thinking. From a young age, we are taught that life should follow a certain path. There is little discussion about what happens when we deviate from that path, just an ingrained sense of order and function.
I am not suggesting that order does not play an important role in life.
Rather, I am suggesting that when we are ruled by it.. when we let life's predetermined code of behavior and expected function, rule all of our choices, there is no room for creative deviance or emotionally driven freedom.
Responsibility in life seems to be the order of the day..every day. Work hard, pay our bills, sleep, eat, clean...these are all daily functions that, yes, do a play a significant role in our ability to interact in society. We need money to function on a base level. We all want shelter, food, clothing, and the comfort of knowing we have a place to lay our heads at night. Those are basic human needs. Past that, what is being without money going to do to us? Nothing. It's a preconceived notion that more of it will make us happier, and it may for a short time when you buy something you've really wanted. At the end of the day though, there is no promise that the thing that money paid for, will always be there. Every THING is temporary.
When it comes to matters of the heart, we are told that we will find some ONE who is just right for us. We hold onto that notion and search for a perfection that doesn't exist. Every relationship is hard on some level. Apart from that chemically driven physical response, it's all in our heads. We have to nurture happiness in relationships. When we enter into a relationship based on doing what we think is best because of how it will fit our lives, we cut out all possibility of creative bonding and growth with another human.
We fear failure in love, work, family, and just about every other aspect of our lives. This fear is all based on expectations for ourselves and others. Expectations that are future based. Expectations that we can't control the outcome of. I can and have expected to be with someone for a long time, only to have them disappear or lose interest. In the end of it, I had to grieve the loss of them in my life and also bury the expectations I had.
What if we could just look at another person and think about what it would be like to just enjoy them? Enjoy them for who they are at that very moment. Not who your mind tells you they should be to you or how they fit into your life's plan....just enjoy the moments that we have with them in a very aware and present way. Willingly take from them what they are offering you and see it as a gift that you can carry in your memory even when they are no longer part of your lives.
What if we looked at the jobs we hold and the income we have as a tool rather than a vehicle to drive us towards a false sense of happiness? What if we really sat down and thought about how money does not make us who we are. What if we sit with the thought that it could be gone in an instant? I have been homeless. I have had to scrimp and save and sell things to feed myself. I have had to ask for help. Yet, I survived that, not just intact..but in a better place than I was before. I have had careers that I loved, but I can also enjoy that talent outside of a 9-5 job. I don't need the order of that job to remind me that it is what's in me that really makes me happy.
So much of our preconceived "failure" to follow an arbitrary path laid out for us before we can even speak, propels us into growth.
It's when we step off that path that creativity and dreams can guide our next steps.
Of all of the choices I have made in life, the ones that are spurred by my dreams and my heart...are the most memorable and life changing. Whether they last for minutes, days, months, or years..they are the most beautiful, soul altering, and joyful moments I have experienced.
It's hard to break away from the thinking of 'this is what I've been taught to do and this is what I've always done.' It's fine to amass a small amount of contentment from the knowing and the routine in life. Just know that whether or not you are prepared, it can change in an instant..and what you are left with is the creative thought process that will move you forward to the next phase.
If you never nurture that part of you, you will feel lost.
I had someone I care for, say, "how do you change what you've always done and known? How do you even know what you should change?"
We have to dream. Even if it's seems scary. We have to let our creative mind take over, more often than not, and let it steer us into the unknown. That hazy place where there is no definition, and no walls to stop you...just a place where we can roam freely and discover the possibilities of what we can create within ourselves. We have to take risks. We have to do things because they are new and different and crazy and unplanned. If we don't, we will never discover that change that could make us feel like we are more than just existing from day to day.
I'm not implying that we can just get rid of fear of the unknown. I am saying that we can let it keep us stuck or we can use it as fuel to create a better life for ourselves. We can hold onto it and wrestle it into a submissive place in the corner of your mind where it can be quieted so that we are free to roam the depths of what else is there inside our creative conscience.
Do, say, or think something, today, that pushes you out off that cliff of the unknown..and fly.
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